Wednesday, May 12, 2010

What Will Happen If You Don't Read This Blog

Back before we went all Little House on the Prairie and got rid of our TV I watched a fair amount of cable news. One thing I think cable news is very good at is fear mongering. You know, scaring the holy living crap out of you so that you'll vote a certain way, spend a certain way, travel a certain way or finally stop wearing banana clips in your hair.

I'm not going to try and scare you with tactics. I'm simply going to tell you the simple truth and then let your conscience be your guide. If you don't start getting A WHOLE LOT OF PEOPLE reading this blog so that I start bringing in a little money I'm going to have to get a job.


I know, tell me about it.

Please don't ask me technical details like how many more people do I need to visit this site a day or how much do I get paid per visit or anything like that because I simply don't know. No really, I don't have any idea. And I know that I have a contract lying around here somewhere that most likely explains all of that but I just don't know where. Its probably right next to the carrot seeds that I lost. I can tell you where it isn't. It isn't in the filing cabinet that Shannon bought me, made files for, and spent hours organizing paperwork for. Nope, not in there.

Over dinner when I was explaining to Jeff that I needed to increase my "blog traffic" and he asked "from how many to how many" and I told him "from not a lot to a lot" and he nearly choked on his food. He gave me that look like what-do-you-mean-you-don't-know and I just smiled. You see, all that administrative stuff just gets lost on me.

So that brings me back to the reason for this post: if you and a whole lot of other people don't start dropping by a whole lot more I'm going to have to get a real job. And just so you know, I won't even put sweet little Samuel and Emily in daycare. No, I will just find a pack of wolves to raise them so think on that a little bit. If me having to get a job doesn't make you feel guilty enough to read this blog everyday than maybe my precious, adorable, innocent children being raised by a pack of savage dogs will.

So come on over to my little blog spot. Let's say once or twice a day. And tell a friend. Or 30. And tell those 30 friends to tell 30 friends. And for crying out loud, if you are some big bloggity blog blog big deal and rolling in the money you are making off your blog then please throw a girl a bone and tell me your secret. Or give me a shout out on your blog. Or stop rolling in that money and come on over and clean my house.


Christy said...

Lets see, I will let you know what we did to cut costs at home. Got rid of caller id, call waiting & voice mail. I make my own powder laundry soap and save so much money and it works! We didn't go anywhere, its sad but true. But I found if I went out I usually spent money that we didn't need to spend. So we stayed home and had adventures close to home. I went through a phase of no paper towels, it did save us money but Tim almost went nuts and I couldn't have that. I want to put in a close line but we have such bad seasonal allergies that its not a good idea. I started cutting coupons and have saved so much money its not even funny!! Its a new way of thinking and it takes time but if anyone can do it....its you Jen!!
I do visit your blog even when you don't update because I think maybe my feed isn't working. I also click my friend :)

Christy said...

I meant to say clothes line, not close line....woops ;)

Kim W. said...

i visit every day!! :)

Christy said...

Another way to drive up traffic is to comment on other people's blogs and you will get cross traffic.

And you should comment more on your own blog, it sometimes keeps the conversation going....and its fun.

But I'm not raking in the doe so maybe you shouldn't take my advice ;)

Katy M. said...

I also clip coupons and make my own laundry soap. It saves money I tell ya! I love your blog. I found it by reading another blog and they said they followed yours so I clicked over. You always make me smile. :)

rlt said...

You should read that expose site about the lady with half a dozen kids who blogged about her son's heart condition or something. Along with mocking her, they highlight the ways she gets people to click through her blog in order to make her rich. You could pick up some pointers.

Peggy said...

What kind of wolves? That could really make a difference.